


The Pain of Pon Farr

by Tarvok



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Explicit Language, M/M, Parent/Child Incest, Pon Farr, Told through audio recordings, Vulcan feelings
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-11-14
Updated: 2017-09-24
Packaged: 2018-01-01 14:20:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1044957
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tarvok/pseuds/Tarvok
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Spock is going into his first pon farr without any contingency plans in place.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. And So It Begins....

**Author's Note:**

> I intend to tell this entire story through audio recordings. There may more than one part to this, if I decide to write a variation of this from a narrative POV.

The Pain of Pon Farr

By Tarvok

Rated M. Character study. Nu!Trek.

 

Chapter One: And So It Begins...

 

First Officer's Personal Log – audio recording  
Date Unknown

 

_The sounds of rustling cloth and heavy, gasping breaths can be heard._

“My Captain, my dear friend.”

_Throaty coughing._

“It has been some time since I saw him last. Sealed into my quarters as I have been for the past several days. Awaiting our arrival on New Vulcan. My blood burns.”

_A deep groaning sob._

“It is taking all of my emotional control to withstand this pain. This yearning for his hands on my body.”

_A low whine._

“His lips on my skin. T'Vet, I can smell him all throughout my quarters. What a fool I have been.”

_There is a long pause intermingled with heavy, wet coughing, and gasping breaths._

“Perhaps Dr. McCoy was correct. I should be in the Medbay sedated and in the healing trance. I will humiliate myself to go there now. My body is not under my control.”

_The quiet sound of hitching sobs._

“What if I pass by him in the hall? He will surely come to see me in the Medbay. He has already pounded on the door to my quarters, demanding to know what is going on. I managed to bite out that I must go to New Vulcan immediately; that it is an emergency.

“What shall I do once there? I have no mate, and according to my father, there have been no offers. Shall I die?”

_“No no no no no no...” can barely be heard, then there are silent gasping breaths for several minutes._

“Does it burn so sweetly for all of my people? My condition has progressed to trembling now. I do not have much time left to mate. Please do not let _plak tow_ come upon me now. Or has it already?

“I cannot think. No room for logic.”

_Harsh, loud pounding, followed by a man's desperate voice, some shouted orders, then more pounding._

“Stupid Jim, stop pounding on the door! Does he have no sense of self-preservation? Please stop, Jim. Please stop. Your voice. I cannot process much more.

“Must I be reduced to this... this useless lump of shivering flesh? It is so hot. I am so hot. It is as though I am in desert of molten lava with no reprieve in sight.”

_Sounds of transparent aluminum warping under pressure. Quick, erratic footsteps... their sudden stop, a gasp._

“Spock! God, Spock!”

“Jim, I need to get him to Sickbay. Now.”

“What the hell's wrong with him, Bones?”

“If his elder self knew what he was talking about, we're lucky you switched headings to the new hobgoblin HQ three days ago.”

“Wha-?”

_Sudden harsh coughing, a barely muffled curse._

“God, Spock... Bones, what do I do?”

“Get your hands under his knees. He's not walking outta here.”

 

….....end recording.......


	2. The Logic of Hope

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> McCoy talks to Sarek in an effort to fix this.

Chapter Two: The Logic of Hope

 

_Static._

“Chief Medical Officer's Log. McCoy here.”

_Rustling of cloth, a sigh of frustration._

“Damned green-blooded sonuva... Spock. He was gonna leave himself locked up in his room and have his little tantrum of death all alone. Dammit. We're two hours from New Vulcan, and I've got reports to file and patients to look at, and that damned... Jim. Jim is in the quarantine with Spock. I've got him strapped in and sedated, but it's not gonna do any damned good if we can't get any of the green-bloods to help him.

“What the hell am _I_ supposed to do?”

_Beeping of the comm system._

“What?!”

_A few clicks, a gasp._

“Ambassador. We're nearly there. Just a couple hours.”

“ _Doctor McCoy. How is my son?”_

“Well, why don't I just carry this thing over to the screen so you can see?”

_The scuffle of footsteps, a crinkle of patent leather shoes against the floor._

“See? He's just peachy. Jim's in there with him – took me forever to get him to wear the safety mask. Mind you, I don't have a clue if Pointy's even got an immune system at the moment. Sir.”

“ _For how long have his symptoms manifested?”_

“Well, that's the thing. He ain't told anybody about this. We had to pry the door to his quarters off to even get him to Sickbay! I'll venture if it's this bad, and what Old Spock told me was true... probably about a week.”

_Subtle clearing of an elegant throat._

“ _Your Captain's precipitous actions in setting a course to New Vulcan may yet be in vain.”_

“What the hell does that mean?”

“ _If my son's counterpart informed you of the severity of his condition, then I shall inform you of the true extent of it. He will die, Doctor, if he remains unbound. As a half-Vulcan, the Council, against my own wishes, as well as those of Elder Spock, have refused to place him on the list of those requiring potential mates.”_

“Seriously? All you guys go through this, and they left him out? What's the cockamamie reason they came up with?”

“ _As Spock is only half-Vulcan, he cannot reproduce and replenish the population. They deemed it logical that he would not need a mate as it was believed he may also be spared the fever. Racial tensions among our people are 'running high' as well, illogical as they are.”_

_A barely stifled exhale from McCoy. Beyond the partition, the sounds of Spock stirring can be heard, then a muffled series of coughs and, “Easy, easy, Spock,” from Jim._

“ _What is transpiring, Doctor?”_

“Pointy's waking up. Give me a minute, will ya? I need to knock him back out. Hold on.”

_The click of the PADD being set down, then heavy footsteps, the swish of the quarantine antechamber opening and closing, the slight buzz of a sonic shower, then the swish of the main chamber opening and closing._

“All right. Jim, sit down. Don't give me that look. I'm a doctor, not a miracle worker, dammit. Spock? I need to sedate you again, okay? Yeah, I'm trying to improve my bedside manner, Jim. Stop it with the look.”

_Heavy gasping breathing, a low groan, and a creak of a biobed giving under pressure from clenched fists._

“Yeah, I bet you'd rather be completely shit-faced through this, Pointy.”

_The soft sound of a hypo-spray, then a slight whine, another series of coughing._

“Bones... he's dying, isn't he?”

“Unless we can either convince some Vulcan he's worth saving, or we do it ourselves... yeah he is, kiddo.”

“What can we do?”

“I was just asking his pap about that before he woke up. You two sit tight.”

_Subdued footsteps, swishing of the quarantine chamber's door opening and closing, then the same for the antechamber._

_A heavy sigh._

“Well, he's out. Did you have any ideas as to what we can do to keep him around a bit longer, Sarek?”

“ _There is a possibility that can be utilised in an emergency situation.”_

“That would be?”

_A brief pause._

“ _I am aware he has 'friends' aboard the Enterprise, Doctor. If a mental link of some consistency has been achieved and maintained for long enough with one of them, a temporary bonding should be possible. It will give us all more time.”_

“The catch?”

“ _No catch, Doctor.”_

_Another pause as a door chime is heard in the background._

“ _I must take this, Doctor. We will speak later.”_

“Yeah. Later.”

_The sounds of the connections ceasing, one shortly after the other._

“Oh, man. He's lying. I know it. There is never _not_ a catch in this damned universe when it involves one of those two.”

_A sigh, the creak of a chair._

“McCoy here again. So there are apparently options. Not good ones, mind, but at least we can somehow buy Spock some more time. He just has to make a temporary mental link with someone. I haven't a clue how in hell he's gonna do that with the state he's in, and I'm not gonna approve it unless I know he ain't gonna scramble somebody before breakfast.”

_Another sigh, the sound of a chair being turned._

“He better pull through this. Jim ain't going make it through if Spock doesn't. Dammit.

“Log off.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sarek is hiding something, but we love him anyway (at least I do).


	3. The Things We Do

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sarek is willing to do anything to save his son.

Chapter Three: The Things We Do

 

_The soft hum of the nearby security equipment as the lens turns to rest upon Sarek and Dr. McCoy._

“Well, I don't understand! You said there wasn't a catch.”

“I meant every word, Doctor.”

“Then why are they _both_ lying in a hospital?”

_A regal sigh._

“It is part of the ritual. I assure you they are perfectly safe. New Vulcan's best Healer, Surook, is watching over them should anything unexpected occur."

“Ritual? All you told me was that they needed a healer present to be a little link in their mind chain.”

“'Mind chain,' Doctor?”

“Yes, dammit. I don't know what else to call it. None of this makes any sense, Sarek. That... Surook fella just came over, checked out Spock, then looked at Jim funny. Yes, funny. Don't you try to tell me you Vulcans don't ever have funny looks.”

“I would never endeavor to do so.”

“What?”

“I would never endeavor to correct your view of my people, Doctor.”

“Why? Am I right?”

“I did not say that either.”

_A frustrated groan._

“Fine. Whatever. He just went up to Jim and said, 'You must accompany us.'”

“As I said, Doctor McCoy. It is part of the ritual. The presence of Healer Surook is to ensure there will be no damage to your captain's mi....”

_Sudden measured footsteps approach._

“Ambassador Sarek, forgive my sudden approach.”

“Surook. Why are not with my son and his captain?”

“It is not possible, Sarek. I extricated myself from the meld once your son's mind touched James'. I was not informed that Spock and James Kirk were not compatible. While their minds are attracted to one another, there is a distinct lack of attraction from James Kirk toward your son. Had I been aware of this, I would have never attempted to join their minds in a temporary link. To attempt to do so would have surely harmed the both of them.”

 _The rustle of clothing as McCoy shifts his stance to more fully face the healer._ “Wait. I thought they were compatible? Did you know this, Sarek?”

“I had suspected it.”

“So what happens now?”

“They will require a temporary residence away from this medical facility to sort this out for themselves once they have awakened and my son's condition has improved.”

 _McCoy lowers his voice._ “But I thought that they'd have to... um... _you know._ ”

 _Another voice, equally quiet._ “Are you asking, Dr. McCoy, if they must consummate the bond? Negative. While their minds are seemingly compatible, James Kirk is unwilling. As Commander Spock is undergoing _pon farr,_ it will be necessary to find a replacement immediately. I am certain you can find a private residence for them in your home, Ambassador.”

“Of course.”

 _McCoy sounds slightly hoarse._ “What are we gonna do about... Spock.” _That last bit came out as a bit of croak._

“While in the shared meld, I did not find evidence of any refusal to do what is necessary to save the commander in James' mind, Dr. McCoy. I quite graphically showed him what would be necessary to perform during the _pon farr_. He then stated his adamant refusal.”

“Oh God. I need to sit down.”

_A soft scuffle as Sarek shows Bones to a nearby chair._

“Dammit, Sarek. Damn you. Damn your wife, and damn Jim.”

 _An uncomfortable and quickly hidden shuffle of feet._ “I must return to him, Ambassador.”

“See that you do.”

_Soft footsteps quickly lead away, then silence._

“Damn you, Sarek.”

_A soft sigh as the older Vulcan joins Bones in the chair to his left._

“You have already damned me, Doctor.”

“Oh shut up. Does this mean Greeny's gonna die?”

“Only if no suitable bondmate can be found within two days. As James has refused, there is no other option.”

“I wasn't aware he didn't want Spock like that. I mean, he freaking _offered_.”

“He did not understand, I believe.”

“Wha...?”

“I melded with him on the shuttle to this facility. He was quite concerned over my son's safety and well-being, but I found no evidence of a romantic attraction.”

“ _God_. He was gonna do it just because they're such good friends.” _A slightly hysterical laugh._ “Talk about friends with benefits.”

“Yes.”

“Is there no other option if a replacement can't be found?”

“I would have no choice.”

“Oh. _Oh_.”

_A long pause, the sound of footsteps and lowered voices pass by._

“I am really sorry I asked that.”

“Your apology is unnecessary.”

 _A grunt of dismissal from McCoy._ “Is that a common thing?”

“No.”

“Ok.”

_Another long, awkward pause, interrupted by the muffled sound of a communicator._

“Bones, here... No. Unless you're about to die, just use a dermal on it, or beam down here... No! If I had to use the transporter instead of the shuttle, so do you, Ensign... Because the commander couldn't be beamed directly into the hospital and I had to be down here before they got here... Ok. You do that, and I'll be up there to file a report on you as a drunkard... That's right – that's my medical booze. The dermal's on the shelf under it... Fine. Use that and let me know if it still hurts in the morning when I beam back up there.”

_A sigh, the soft crinkle of the pleather chair as McCoy resettles himself._

“Is everything well, Doctor?”

“Yes. The new guy got himself a freaking plasma burn. I swear! The coils are not that hard to avoid, being all glowy and _hot_. Damn. Now I'm talking like him. Damn Jim.”

“I assure you my son did not choose to undergo this.”

“Oh I know that. I'm just... I'm just everything and nothing all at once.”

“I understand.”

“Do you?”

“My logic is uncertain where my son is concerned.”

“That's new.”

“Not to me, Doctor.”

_A long pause._

“Sarek?”

“Yes, Doctor?”

“Would you really go through with it? If they can't find another person for Spock? Would you really...”

“As I have stated previously, I would have little choice.”

“But... what about Spock's choice? Surely he wouldn't want this, Sarek.”

“It is not up to my son.”

 _A sigh, a rustle of clothing as Sarek shifts position to face Bones._

“I have already lost my wife. I have no intention of losing our only child also.”

“He'll have to keep this from everyone on the ship. You know this.”

“I am aware the only individual to know will be you, Doctor.”

“ _God_. I need a fucking _drink..._ I'm gonna go see how Jim's doing. I just saw him walking the hall over there somewhere.”

_Sudden, quick footsteps, some muffled voices. An uncomfortable laugh. More footsteps, softer this time, toward the opposite direction._

 


	4. Yearning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sarek loves his son very much.

Chapter Four: Yearning

 

_The soft hum of a home security system._

“Father?”

_Soft breathing, the rustle of cloth as Spock shifts onto his back on a bed._

“Where is Jim?” 

“He has refused, my son.”

“I do... not understand.”

“Your beloved James has refused the bond.”

_Quiet sigh, the sound of a deep cough._

“Then I shall die.”

_A short pause._

“You shall not.”

“Father?”

“Do you recall when you were small?”

_The clearing of a delicate throat, movement, the click of a pitcher as it is being poured into a tall glass._

“Drink this.... There. When you were small, I held you in my arms often while you were ill. Is this in your memory?”

_Coughing._

“Affirmative. You... would hold me while I....” _A soft rustle of cloth as Spock readjusts his position to a sitting one._ “While I was incapacitated and Mother was incapable of caring for me.”

“Yes, Spock.”

_An uncomfortable, long silence._

“I do not understand, Father.”

“I will care for you once again, my son. Your life will be spared. Do you understand?”

_Yet another lengthy pause, continued coughing, more clinking of glass. The brushing of cloth against cloth as Sarek sits on the bed close to Spock. Too close._

“I will ease your first time, my son. We will form a bond of our own, and you will live. Is this acceptable to you?”

_Spock's gasp is muffled by his father's hand as Sarek leans in close. The gentle sound of buttons sliding from their catches, one at a time._

“We will join our bodies and our minds as one, and you will live. Does this disgust you? Do I?” 

_Soft shushing, the rustle of clothing being removed._

“I will not lose you, my precious child. Will you consent to the melding of our minds together as one?”

_There is a long pause, shallow breathing. Then a low moan, deeply from within Spock's chest. A loud tearing of cloth as he reaches toward Sarek._

“Yesss...”

“Very well... My mind to your mind... Your mind to my mind... What began long ago shall now blossom into more.... My precious child shall be saved by a father's love... Our minds, one and together.”

_Dual moans, the rustle of remaining clothing as it is removed, discarded to join it's brethren on the floor with a soft sound. Gasping, sounds of gentle suckling.... heavy breathing, a sudden intake of breath from Spock._

“Fa...”

“Shhh, my baby boy. I shall sate this burning need within you with the meeting of my own need.”

“I..." 

“It is known to me of your feelings. It is between only us. You may fall into my arms without shame, my beautiful one.”

_Quiet, hushed sobbing, relieving, soothing sounds, groans... Gasped begs._

“The bond will fully mature once your need is satisfied, my lovely child. Let me pleasure you.”

_The sound of blankets being carelessly tossed to the floor, to join equally unnecessary clothing. Soft crooning sounds as an elder tongue begins to taste._

“You have a flavor all your own.”

_Gasping breaths, shushed begging._

“Shhhhh... baby boy.... shhh. I shall claim you as you desire soon enough.”

_Heavy breathing, a deep moan._

“Beautiful. The flower of youth, my precious _t'hy'len_.”

“Father... I burn...”

“Yes.”

_The sounds of thrusting, intermittent inhalations, gasps, soft cries. Quiet sobbing, keening moans._

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My own little version of "friend, brother, lover," - t'hy'len- is "friend, lover, son."


	5. Ties That Bind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> During a brief lessening of the fever, Sarek encourages his son to do as he wants before it becomes too difficult to remember his actions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Supreme apologies for the long wait!

_The quiet shush of an electronic door, Sarek's residence._

"Spock? Are you well?" 

_Soft breathing can be heard from near the bed._

"Y- yes. I am myself."

"It is only temporary. I have brought you sustenance in the meantime." 

_The clink of silverware on a dish, sounds of chewing, swallowing, drinking._

_A pause. More chewing. The rustle of fabric as Sarek joins his offspring on the bed._

"It will be time soon, my son. Rest. I will take care that the lull lasts a bit longer."  _Wet sounds of kisses, a moan, the rustle of a blanket and sheet, gasping breaths._

"Father..."  _Creak. Hitched breath. Muffled moaning of a tune beloved from childhood in a elderly voice. A younger voice crying out in need, then sighing._

 _More rustling, more creaking._ "Spock, I-" 

"Please."

_A grunt, the sounds of thrusting, dual moans, gasping breaths. Whispered nothings and everything, sloppy kisses, groaning._

_The sound of thrusting coming faster, soft thumping against the wall, louder moaning, more gasping, heavy breaths, an elderly voice crying out, a younger one begging, pleading._ "More, Father, more!"  _Slurping, hitched breathing, weight shifting on mattress. Sobbing._

"Shh, my love. It is only another position,"  _spoken with affection, the sound of a bottle clicking, the squelching of fluid, a gasp._ "Yes. Open yourself for me. There are many ways of pleasure. I will show you them all."

 _Sobbing, moaning, the sound of cloth tearing, a quiet chuckle, quickly silenced._ "Yes, Spock. Just like that. Move yourself up and down along my fingers."  _A pause._ "Perfect."

"Father?" _whispered._

"Mm?"

"The burning..."  _A growl ending in a low groan. An elderly gasp, a whoosh of air with a loud thump as Sarek is lifted and dropped, followed by a younger whine._

"That's it, my lovely son, take your pleasure. I will match it with my own."  _Breathless._

_A sudden subtle pop, high-pitched cry, a hiss of pain, followed by louder growling._

"Go on, Spock! Do as you will to me."

"I don't..."  _a hitched breath,_ "Wish to hurt you."

"Do not hold back. I want this. I want  _you._ For so long now, Spock. Give this to me."

"But the fever, it is returning. If I give in to this, I won't be able to-"

"Spock."

_Wet sound of kissing, gasping breath, the creak of the bed._

"I want this Spock. I want  _you._ Fill me with your passion. Share your lusts with me, my son. I can meet them, easily."

 _Sobbing, a nearly incoherent 'I am so sorry, Father, please forgive me," before the sounds of strong thrusting are heard on the recording. The thumping of previous begins again and picks up in volume, there are moans of pleasure and moans of pain. The sound of bodies slapping together drowns out the sudden keening weeping of the elderly partner, but not the growls and snarls of the younger._


End file.
